I know it’s only been one week but I keep telling myself I should be over this by now, because everyone around me is telling me that too. And I’m young, I have so much more ahead of me, there’s something better. But if I keep thinking that there’s something better, I’ll never be happy.
Haven’t gone through something like this in a long time. Not this intense. I was completely taken by surprise. And I feel so small and broken. I lost my best friend. I miss him so much. So fucking much.
Welp. It’s over.
- gettinhappy-and-gettinhealthy said: If someone cannot respect you enough to answer a text message, then are they really worth your time, energy and pain…I’m talking from experience and know it hurts but moving forward I met and am engaged to the most beautiful soul, so let it go hun
Thanks for the advice. When he left he said I needed to let him think, which I’m trying to respect. It’s just a question of how long should I give him? We’ve been together for 3 years and it’s such a sudden ending.
Bleeeegh. I can’t sleep, barely eat…my stomach is in knots and my chest feels cold. I feel sick. Everything was going perfectly, and then everything that could have gone wrong happened within days of each other. And now I’m left here waiting. And what scares me the most is the unknown. Not knowing if he’s going to come back, or talk. Or if he really did just walk out that morning and had no intention of coming back.
I guess when we had the last break up a year ago we didn’t talk for a while and I ended up pushing him even further away. But he came back. It took a couple weeks, but he came back. And even then I didn’t think we’d ever make it up. But we did. And this seems so trivial compared to other things we’ve put each other through in the past.
I feel oddly calm in some respects about this. More logical and clear headed, but still worried sick. I can tell I’ve matured because I’m not trying to constantly text him and going crazy, because I know that would only escalate the situation. And part of me knows what to do, and part of me doesn’t, because I’m scared of what the outcome will be. I want to text him again tomorrow and ask him to please respond…..but what if he doesn’t…then what??? I just want to plead with him to come back, cry, and scream some sense into him. But I can’t.
All my friends who know us say he can’t just walk away and that we will see each other again because they know how much he loves me. But sometimes people do the unexpected, and I know it’s a possibility that he did just walk away.
And I don’t know…when he’s away I wonder how he’s feeling. If he’s hurting just as much, if he’s having a hard time. If he cried or not. If he talked to anyone about this, or just got drunk. I wonder if he knows how badly I’m hurting. I remember when we got into a petty fight when we first started dating and I hurt him really badly and he just cried on my bed. And it was so painful for me to see. I wonder if he can see how badly I’m hurting too.
I always follow my heart, and I want to really badly and believe what it’s telling me. But it just doesn’t know right now! It knows I love him, and it hurts, and it can’t believe that it would be over like this. But I don’t know what to do!
Either I text him tomorrow and ask him to respond….or I just wait for him to make the move. It’s been 4 days since I last saw/talked to him. And I’ve texted him twice but he hasn’t responded to either. Is that a sign that it’s done already? Or he still needs time? AGGGH.